Complaint Review: Dream marriage and Tatiana Evdina

Is dream-marriage.com a fraud?

unethical defenition 

not conforming to approved standards of social or professional behavior; "unethical business practices"

wrong - contrary to conscience or morality or law; "it is wrong for the rich to take advantage of the poor"; "cheating is wrong"; "it is wrong to lie"

ethical - conforming to accepted standards of social or professional behavior; "an ethical lawyer"; "ethical medical practice"; "an ethical problem"; "had no ethical objection to drinking"; "Ours is a world of nuclear giants and ethical infants"- Omar N. Bradley

scam defenition [skm] Slang

a stratagem for gain; a swindle

vb scams, scamming, scammed

(tr) to swindle (someone) by means of a trick to get money or property from ( another) under false pretenses;cheat;defraud , to get by false pretences or fraud

Jan Jacobs, journalist. Belgium

Date: 28/01/2010

As of today, February 1st 2010, this girl is still online at Dream Marriage.  ID 82924

Dream (NIGHTMARE) Marriage......

 by Jan Jacobs, Belgium.  Written January, 2010

This is a true story, about my experience with Dream-Marriage.com and my short encounter with a girl that I thought was a real honest and decent person; looking for a real relation. I was wrong!  I myself am convinced that it was a scam and a rip-off from the very beginning.  But I will leave it up to the reader to form his own opinion. The girl and the agency in question were offered the possibility to react on this article, before publishing. Im a part time journalist in Belgium. I do economic topics. Not these things. Im more into investigating and delivering the news and hot economic items to the press agencies. I also run a business that is specialized in engineering and industrial services. I employ 40 people. I speak five languages and I have traveled the world. It did not help me at all. Was I naive? Possibly. Was I wrong to trust? Did I make mistakes? Yes, I think so. But, what is so very important is the fact that I was honest and decent and with the best intentions. And this is much more than what we can say about the girl and the agency. With this report I want to make the people know about this. Be careful and learn from my mistakes.

A smart man learns from his mistakes......

A smarter man learns from the mistakes of others......

Please bear in mind that Im not a native English speaker. My native language is Dutch. I'm sorry if I make spelling errors. I also want the reader to know that Ukraine is a nice country with nice and decent people. It is absolutely worth a visit. Talk to local people. Get to know the people and just have a great time. So my opinion is not tainted about all this. You can get a bad experience in the West as well. But the agency is making a lot of money and are not at all interested in your relationship. They just don't care. They offer a service and they don't care if the girls scam. They only want it to be impossible for you as a customer to prove all of this. And they prepare the girls very well to avoid you ever being able to prove it. Read my report.

First encounter.....

One day I was opening my mailbox. I received a spam mail from a company named dream-marriage.com. I was curious and opened the mail. It was an invitation to become a free member for three days. I was browsing through the website and, boy oh boy, these girls where absolutely stunning. Models, beautiful and really hot looking young women where staring at me from there obviously nice photo shop pictures. I decided to try.

Everyone starts somewhere.....

One day after I became a member, I received hundreds of mails and invitations from girls, ready to meet, chat and write; They where really looking for the love of there life; A real man to take them away from this horrible country, Ukraine.

Im 45, Im 175cm, weigh 82 kilo (5 kilo overweight, I know) and I dress well, not so bad looking, I have good income and Im free. So why not try this? It was very tempting. And the girls looked like super models.

I paid my platinum member fee and I got some credits to chat. Once I logged in, I immediately was bombarded with requests to chat. At first I did not chat at all. I only wrote letters and I received answers. The girls where nice, they responded and even sent me photos. This looked all OK. Of course I was happy with the response. It was very flattering to receive so many letters from girls that looked like models. And from the letters I wrote and the responses I got, I could clearly tell that this was the girl I was corresponding with. Some of the letters I wrote where never answered. Nothing strange. They where probably not interested in me.

Let's chat.....

One day, April 7, 2009, I got a chat invitation from Tatiana. I noticed her, because previously she put me on her admirers list. She was nice, 27, great looking and hey, she was even funny to chat with. That was new. She was not talking of leaving her country, nor was she complaining all the time. She was nice and funny. She made me laugh and I made her laugh. For me this was the first time I was in chat with such a lovely person. But I could tell from her responses and her way of using the tools, that she already had a lot of experience in chat. Before I met Tatiana, I was in contact with other girls, and I got the personal information as well. Until today Im in contact with a girl I met on DM. I will visit her in February. She already deleted her profile with DM.

I'd like to ask you for your address......

Anyway we started chatting a lot, and writing and sending each other photos. We had much in common and one day she invited me over to visit her. In June would be nice, she said. I accepted. I asked her personal information from the agency. I got her cell phone number and address. The address was Prospect Lenina. But this turned out to be a false address. The girl told me that it was the address of the agency. Her address was Dmytrieva street.

Where's the Laptop?......

I got it from her because I wanted to send her a laptop. I did send a laptop, but in Ukraine you cant send a laptop to a person I found out. It was with DHL, and they returned the package. But the laptop got stolen on it's way back. DHL refunded me the money for the loss of the laptop. No harm done here. But this way I found out that the address provided by the agency was a false address. Strange thing, you pay to get the real address, not a fake one I guess. Later I found out that the other men with her address, where indeed only given the Prospect Lenina address. They never got her real address. Imagine, you buy a car, a Toyota and you get a Daewoo delivered. Same thing. You pay for correct and verified information. Not some fake address.

I need a little Cash......

Before I visited the girl, I was sending her money. She did not ask directly I must admit. Accept once, where she asked for money to pay for a passport. She borrowed money from her colleague (Natasha) and wanted to pay back the money. I offered the extra money so she could buy some nice things for herself. She accepted $700 in total. I have the Western Union transcripts to proof all of this.

I wanted to surprise her......

I arrived one day earlier. But I did not tell her. I was cautious, did not know what to expect. So I told her that I would arrive on Saturday, but I arrived there on Friday. Once I was there, I called her and let her know that I was in Kontinent Hotel; She did not know this hotel at all. Strange, it was in center of the town. It was not strange to me at the moment. But looking back, it sure was strange.

And we met. She was with a friend; Olga. Her English was much better than Tatiana. Olga was OK, nice and decent girl. I was surprised that Tatiana was the girl from the photo. Of course the photo shop made her look better in the photos on the DM site. But she was very beautiful. Yes I was pleased.

How about dinner and a movie?......

We spent one week together. And I was with her every day. She came to the hotel, and she and her friend showed me around Nikolaev and we also went to Odessa and Koblevo. I also bought her some clothes and I brought her a laptop. Her friend Olga I gave a cell phone and some electronic gift she wanted. In total, I spent about $1500 on gifts for her and her friend. I also paid for cinema, food in restaurants, taxi and aqua-park. I did not mind this. I knew before I came there, that I would have to pay all of this. So it was no bother at all. Please bear this in mind, that average income is maybe $ 150 a month for working people in Ukraine. To these girls I was the big spender from Europe. For me it was not expensive at all.

Great sushi with a beautiful girl......

I have to say that after two days, her friend Olga was not with us anymore. She showed up on our last day together. When we went to a Japanese restaurant, I was pleased that I was alone with Tatiana for a few days. It was all very nice. We had a good time and it was nice together. She was funny, nice, polite and a decent girl. And yes she was beautiful.

Let's keep chatting and see what happens......

At the end of the week I was very fond of her and I was falling for this girl. I told her this, and she told me that she was not in love with me. But she wanted to keep corresponding and maybe she would fall in love with me after all. I told her that we would keep in contact and see how it works out.

Please don't break my heart......

I was back in Belgium, and we kept on chatting and writing. And she invited me again to come over and see her again. I asked her if she wanted this because she was in love, or for gifts and money. I wanted to protect myself; I was not going to come over and make all the efforts for nothing. And I was very clear that I did not want to get heart broken over this her. She wrote me that she was in love and that she was so impressed by me and that she wanted me to come and live with her and stay with her, make a future together. I was the only guy for her. I was the only guy with her personal information and the only guy that she invited to see her. That is what she wrote me and told me; I was in contact with her every day. I had no doubts about her. Why would I? She wrote that she did not want her heart broken as well. She was heart broken in the past, and did not know how to handle her feelings. That was a good explanation to me. But I was wrong. She was in chat with Mark, at the same time as she was in chat with me. The photos I made of our trip she sent to Mark and the other guys, telling it were photos taken by her cousin. And the trip she took with me. This was training and work, she wrote the guys. Thats why she was not in chat.

Love is blind......

At the same time, I was reading on the Internet on forums, about scamming and dream-marriage. It was not nice to read all of this. But hey, they where all wrong, I was there with the girl, and she was real, honest, good, funny and decent.  Best of all she was in love with me. So what could go wrong?

Lets do a little shopping......

I went back in august and we met up to Odessa, she was with her niece, Oksana. Nice girl and very good in English; I rented two rooms and we had fun together, we went to the beach, we went to nice restaurants, We did some shopping, but not so much and we talked a lot. It was pleasant. I gave her niece a laptop. It was a nice gift for her and she was over the moon with this gift. Again, I can afford it, so I did not mind to give a gift.

The bus ride to Yalta......

After four days, Tatiana and I traveled to Yalta, by bus. We arrived in Yalta and we went to our hotel; I made reservations prior to our arrival. One room, and one bed; She was not very pleased with this. But she soon found out that it was OK. I would not do anything against her will. She trusted me and it was fine. We took excursions, to Sudak, to dolphins show, to botanical garden,Voronsak Castle and we had diner in a nice restaurant; She convinced me to try Borsh and Solyanka. Local dishes.  We had conversations and long beach walks. It was super. We had lots of fun, and it was very funny at times. The hotel was nice, the swimming pool was nice, the food the people. I was not complaining at all. She even asked for more time off from her work to stay longer; I did not mind this at all.

She loved me on the train......

We where going home by train which we took from Simferopol. Im sure she will smile when she thinks about the train trip and the running around with the luggage. On the train she asked me to stay longer. I asked her why? She would work all day, and I would be in Nikolaev by myself; Not a nice thing to look forward to for me. But she told me that she loved me and that she wanted me to stay. I agreed.  Her father was sick and was not feeling good at all. I remember at our last evening together in Yalta that I made a toast to his health. She was very emotional about this.

Tatiana???  Where are you?......

Back in Nikolaev, she was not with me the next day. That was a surprise. Where was Tatiana? I could not reach her.  Next day she was back and we had good time together. She apologized for not being with me the other day. But she had so much work to do, and it was late already and she did not want to come over to the hotel.

The photo and my laptop......

That weekend we went back to Odessa beach. When I came back from Odessa, I was talking to other men in the hotel, and there was a Swedish guy, Alexander; He was looking at my laptop and he recognized Tatiana; He told me that he was going to meet her next week Monday. I got hot and cold at same time. What was happening?  I sent Tatiana SMS and email. I was really completely in shock. Immediately I was thinking about the scam articles.

Who's meeting who?......

Next day. She sends me SMS's. She is in shock too. Yes she knows him from chat, but she did not want to meet him at all. She came to the hotel and we left. The Swedish guy was not there. He knew that she was coming to the hotel, but he did not see her. He did not show up. She was furious with him and she also told the other men that where there with me in the hotel, that she did not agree to see him.

I promise to delete my profile......

I asked her to delete her profile with the agency and she agreed. I wanted to avoid future problems like this and it was the only way. We went to see Bill Green and Larisa. They live in Nikolaev and Larisa is Ukrainian.

Red flag, Red flag, Red flag......

I met Bill Green when I was in the hotel and was introduced to him by other men. The things he told me, were very disturbing. Dream-marriage (and all other agencies) was one big scam, the girls are paid to chat and lure men to Ukraine, and the girls were almost never serious about any relationship. The people in Nikolaev and in the rest of Ukraine consider it a dirty business. He told me and the other men to look for red flags. It was what I had read previously on the Internet about scamming.

She just needs a job......

Red flags. Not showing up, working with her own driver and translator, always asking for money and gifts, not removing there profiles on the Website, fake address and they reveal almost no personal information about themselves. Sad stories, girls getting paid by the agency to chat and write. The local newspapers were filled with ads for hiring and looking for girls.

The shocking truth......

It was shocking to hear. It was first hand information. The guy was not talking BS. He worked and lived there and he was running an English school in Nikolaev. Over the past 2 years he was in contact with hundreds of men. They all failed. Not one succeeded. I was sure I would prove him wrong with Tatiana.

I was right and Bill was wrong......

On Monday, the day I left Nikolaev, we went to see Bill in his office. Tatiana had her laptop with her and I put the photos and films from our holiday on her computer. In the office I deleted my profile with DM. And Tatiana told Bill and I, that she was going to go to the agency next day and delete her profile as well. I was right and Bill was wrong. She was OK. Not a scam artist.

Back in Belgium, I catch her lying......

Once I was back in Belgium. And a few days later I looked at the agency and I could see her in chat. That was strange. She was supposed to delete her profile not chat; I contacted her. She was surprised that I could see her chat. I was not a member anymore. So how could I see that she had not deleted her profile? Well you can, it is easy. At first she lied. No she was not in chat? But when I told her that I could see it. She admitted it. It was to say goodbye to her chat friends and to write to this Alexander that he was a big piece of s**t. She would go to the agency and delete her profile when she found the time. OK, that was good by me. But I was suspicious. Bills warning, the articles on the Internet! It made me very suspicious. So far, I hadn't caught her lying to me. But this was a big one.

There's been a death in the family......

A few days later she sent some SMS's. Her father is hospitalized and very ill. She is not in chat, but her profile had not been deleted. I understand that her father is sick in hospital. Two days later, her father dies in the hospital. A disaster.

I forgot to quit my job at the agency......

She is not in chat for more than two weeks; profile is still on. She sends me SMSs not to visit her in September. I ask why?  Well, her mother and sister are mourning and her father is dead and all the problems with this. They need time.

She only needs fifteen hundred bucks......

After a few weeks, she calls me and she needs money. She needs 1000, ($1500) for university. Her father always took care of this. But he was gone. Could I do this? For her and her sister. I agree. But I tell her once more to delete her profile; She agrees.

She's a working girl......

Next day I look at the chat. She is chatting. I call her and I open my account with DM again. I invite her for chat and she accepts my invitation. She tells me that it is only for a little bit, not much. Few friends. Im furious. I know, I know......... I should have stopped the relation right there and then. It was a very big mistake for me to keep trying to make it work. I knew very well it was over there and then.

She's only on fourteen web sites......

I decide to confront her in Nikolaev. September 28, I go over and we talk and sort things out.  At that moment (September 26) Tatiana opens another account with Anastasia date. At the same day she writes me on DM, that she wants me there forever and that she is madly in love with me. I find this out in October. After I contacted Anastasia. They told me that she opened a new account on September 26.  I told her this, and that she was with maybe 14 other websites. She told me that it was not her on these websites. The agency was doing this not she. Well, we know this is not true. She was even very active with the other websites. Natasha club told me this when I contacted them. So bear in mind that she was in chat a lot on DM. It looked like a full time job to me.

The agency forbids her to speak with Bill and Larisa......

By that time Im so suspicious. I see Bill and Larisa. And they are very suspicious too. Tatiana tells them that the agency forbids her to talk with Bill and Larisa. I write her and tell her that for me this is not a decent relation at all. And I will not give her anything more until I think this is a decent relation. I already gave her about $4000 in a five month period along with a coat, boots, laptop and cell phone. I have the receipts from Western Union and the credit card receipts as well.

I promise to use Skype and Yahoo...... Someday......

Anyway I start writing and chatting with other girls on the site. But I keep in touch with Tatiana. She still writes me and tells me not to worry. Im the only man for her. I must not be jealous at all. The letters she writes are on the DM site. So there is record of this.

She always refuses to write with personal email and Skype. I open a Skype account in her name and I open a Yahoo account. But she refuses to use them. She always promises. But she never did.

I have a real bad feeling......

In October I go visit her the last time. But I must admit. I was talking with other girls and with Bill and Larisa and with many more men about this. I feel that this is just not right. And I tell her. She tells me not to worry. She wants to go slow, because her mother. She stills wants to live with me, wants me to come and live in Nikolaev with her. She would stay with me in Nikolaev when I rent an apartment. In the beginning a few days a week and we would build up the frequency. Im not convinced. Im very suspicious now. I do not feel good in this relation at all.

Facebook...... I find out everything about her.

In November, my stepdaughter is playing with her Facebook account. And she tells me that she can find every body on Facebook. I tell her, no you cant. She types in Tatiana Evdina. Big surprise. A Facebook page with her name and photo. I call her and write her about this.  No, not her she says. And Mark! The guy on Facebook. She does not know him at all; I tell her that he must know her, because he knows her last name and he has got a photo from her. No, she does not know him. Last name you can only know when you buy her personal information with the agency. I know she is lying to me.

She loves Mark, Glen and oh yeah......ME!

I write Mark. He writes back. Well this is strange he tells me. Im in chat with her for six months, and she invited me over to Odessa. She would bring her sister Kate. I explain all to him. And he breaks up with her immediately. He thinks we are being scammed big time. Because. He received another mail from a guy. Glen from the USA! He calls her hot legs. He is in chat with her on DM for two months. Mark also opened a Skype and yahoo account for her. And yes the same story again. She refuses to use it.

Three's Company, four's a crowd......

So we are three guys. I was with her four times, I traveled with her and I was the love of her life. We find out later that there was even a fourth guy. But we do not know his name. He was with her in December 2009. This we know from the agency DM.

The Fox Guarding the Hen House......

We all chat, write and make plans with her. And she plays along. The men pay enormous amounts to chat and write and ask for information to DM. And they get cheated all the time. There is just no way of knowing how many men and how many appointments the girls make. On Facebook you can see this. On DM, only the girls can see the men and the girls. Clearly discrimination. And only the men pay, while the girls often make the first step. For the girls it is free. Discrimination based on gender. Not allowed I guess.

Remember to Read the Fine Print......

The agency will tell you that you agreed with there terms if you become a member. That is right. But if the rules are in violation or in conflict with the law, then clearly the law is to be the guiding line. This is clearly the case here. Swindle, scam, unethical behaving and discrimination based on gender.

There's always a little luck involved......

The men just have no possibility to check if the girl is honest. How many friends shes got and what she is planning. It would be a whole different ball game if we knew this. The agency is not doing anything to prevent this. They say they do. But no.

We found out because Mark opened a Facebook account and my stepdaughter typed the name of Tatiana Evdina. How many men will be this lucky?

Glen's going to learn the hard way......

Glen, the guy from USA, he does not believe us. But after a few letters he is rapidly becoming a believer. He realizes that we are scammed. I decide not to tell Tatiana and set her up. I want to expose her. I brake up with Tatiana, but I only tell Mark this. Tatiana still thinks that I will have a relation with her. That Im still madly in love with her! I keep her believing this. I keep writing and chatting with her.

It's Pay Back time......

Mark writes a complaint to DM asking for his money back. I do the same and yes they refund us all our money. They pay back four guys. Mark and I chatted with her for 6000 to 7000 minutes in six months. We do not know about the other guys. But we estimate that she must be in chat for about 20000 minutes in one year. And all during her work hours. She makes at least $8000 a year for the agency. Remember that she was very active on other sites as well.  I write to Bill and the agency. We know it is a scam. But how can we proof all this? We know for sure. Four men; reaching the same conclusion! After mailing each other. We know we are right.

We just want Dream-Marriage to do what they promise......

I know, it is wrong of me to think that it is going to be all right. She will realize she is wrong.  Maybe, she will be sorry.  No, she is not sorry. She is sorry that she has been found out. But she is not sorry for her actions. No regrets with her. The agency writes back to me that without the whole story and without the name and/or ID of the girl, they cant do anything. They ask me if Im talking about the same girl as Mark is. I tell them yes. We are talking about the same girl.  I write the full story to DM.  Mark and I believe the girls profile should be deleted. We are convinced that she is a scam artist and she is not looking for a relation at all. And she will keep on doing it to other men. We believe Glen feels the same. Bill Green feels the same. He is convinced. He knows first hand and he was with us. He knows her. He knows me.

We furnished proof that we sent money to Tatiana......

We keep writing the agency. The agency wants the Western Union transfers, SMS's where she asks money. I deliver. They want Mark to ask for her profile to be deleted. Mark asks the agency to delete her profile. We all do this. The agency calls us. We again explain why we think she is scamming.

Tatiana moves on to scam more unsuspecting victims......

Tatiana writes me on November 19, that she will break up with me. I dont care about this. I already broke up with her! But she does not know this. She breaks up because I found out about her. Not because I was complaining to the agency. She does not know about our complaints at that particular moment. She breaks up because I found out about her. No other reason. I write her a letter and let her know that I already broke up with her 10 days prior to her breaking up with me, that I was setting her up. I also tell her that I was in chat with other girls. I could not have a relation with such a girl and I think no man in his right mind would accept this behavior from his girlfriend.  I know now for sure that it was always her intention to scam me. How do I know this?   Read on........

I am and always was, a real gentleman......

A man or woman in love! How do they behave? Well, they climb mountains, swim oceans and fight with all competition with their bare hands and brake down walls with bare hands when it is a threat to there relationship. You do not leave a relation because the soup is too hot. When you are in love, real deep love (like she wrote to me), well then you do not give up this easy. She was looking for a way out and she found a reason. I never gave her an excuse to break up with me. I was good, nice, decent, honest, generous, and a real gentleman all the way. So there was no reason for her to dump me. I, on the other hand, had plenty reasons. Remember! When she broke up, she did not know about us complaining to the agency. She only knew that I found out about her lying and cheating. I spoiled her plans!

Would I do this when I think she is lying to me?

The agency calls Tatiana. She denies everything. We are jealous and dumb men. She never asks for money and the gifts, well they are gifts. She never wanted a relation with me. That was my imagination. Well in her letters in DM, she talks different. I was, the one, she writes. If this is the way she is treating the love of her life, well than I pity the person she really hates. And would I send this much money to a girl that is not serious about this relation? Would I come back to her a second, third and fourth time, when Im not serious? Would I do this when I think she is lying to me? I dont think so.

All girls are taught to steal and lie by

Marriage Agency managers......

Anyway, we keep writing to the agency and we insist that she be removed. But even after they pay back four men and receive complaints, they still keep her on. Why?  Instead of deleting the girl. They delete the complaining men. And they ask proof in writing that Tatiana asked for money. These girls are clever and well prepared by the local manager. You will never receive a request for money in writing. They will ask you on the phone and with SMSs and when you are there to visit the lady. How can you prove this?  Nobody can do this.  Im convinced that in a court of law, with a jury, we would win this case with eyes closed and our fingers in our nose. No doubt. A jury would be in our corner all the way.

Marriage Agencies are just like a fly trap......

The agency knows this of course very well. They prepare the girls for what to do and what not to do.  The agency tells us that it is perfectly normal that girls and men lie to each other on the website. There is nothing they can do about it. I beg to differ. What they say is that they cant delete the girl because we provide no evidence. The girl is doing nothing wrong.  The men pay and get cheated big time. They have no way of finding out if the girl is honest and serious. He finds out when it is to late. He goes to a foreign country where he does not know the culture or the language. He is in a foreign country and he pays for everything. And the agency is doing nothing to warn and protect.  Marriage agencies are just like a fly trap.

Of course, there are men that scam too......

Of course there are many men on the website that are absolute idiots. Very old, no teeth, bald, ugly and living on welfare and on and on! They have no realistic dreams about finding a young, beautiful, smart girl to bring home and live in s**t for the rest of her life. But I do not fall under this category I m sure. But never the less, they do not deserve to be screwed up and left in crap. The agency should tell in advance that it is not very realistic what they are aiming for. Instead the agency does nothing but taking money from these men.  I spoke with marriage agencies in my country. Believe me when I say this. It is a very big difference in approach. This is not possible with these agencies.

I only came to see Tatiana and nobody else......

If men and women date on these websites, it is very normal that you speak with more people at the same time. It is normal that you chat and keep your options open with more than one woman. But you should tell. And you must not do what Tatiana did. I only came to see her. And when she told me in August that she was serious again and again in her letters, I expected this to be true. She was in chat with men at the same time while she told the same story to these men. I can only conclude that it was pre-meditated. The agency should not allow this. I know the normal agencies do warn customers.

Suspicious activity and the first sign, we will remove her......