Complaint Review: Retirement Planning Services

My husband and I recently had a run in with Retirement Planning Services. My husband met one of their staff at a golf outing a couple months ago. Since we inherited a little money recently we thought it might not be a bad idea to at least listen to what they had to say. This was the first mistake.
They insisted we come to their office for our initial visit. I must admit it looked pretty professional from the outside. That feeling changed the minute we stepped into the place. First of all it smelled like a greasy egg fart the minute we walked in the door. I am not sure if someone let one go before we stepped in but it reeked so bad my eyes started hurting.
When Tara, the hostess, came out to greet us and take us to our table I noticed she had spinach or tobacco on her teeth, or a combination of the two. She took us back to a cigarette smoke laden meeting room where we met Jane and Mike. We were not sure if these guys were making out before we got there but her blouse was a couple buttons too low and Mike was straight up sweating and trying to zip up his pants. It didn't take too long to figure out where the smell was coming from once the door was closed, it was Tara. It must have been irritable bowel syndrome or something because she laid out a fart as thick as motor oil and then pretended like she didn't do it. My husband grabbed my arm to support me as I almost doubled over before I even pulled my chair out.
When we sat down they pulled out this official looking financial profile questionnaire. It was a simple ploy to find out how much money we had and where it was at. It took a long time for them to explain some pretty obvious stuff. Just as I was about to fall asleep at the table I felt this hand run across my thigh. At first I thought it impossible but it was true, Jane was trying to feel me up. I was just about to say something when my husband stood up. He said, "What in the hell is on my chair?" but I knew by the time he stood up what had happened. Someone that had previously sat in the chair had an accident. It was all over the outside of a new pair of pants.
We excused ourselves and made it for the exit as fast as we could. They followed us all the way to door asking us what is wrong and almost begging us to stay. I am not sure what was on their mind but it surely wasn't going to have anything to do with our money. I am not sure how these guys can even keep the lights on.