Complaint Review: Jake Atkinson - Round Rock Texas

In Addition: He brags to others that "Mr. Bean", his real name is Rowen Atkinson is his cousin..... Hmmmm, right??!! I received this letter from a comic in Austin, another person he tried to scam as well. I've deleted some names in it to save any embarrassment to them: Oh my God, I'm so sorry you ran into that p***k. How did he scam you? I"m not sure I really want to know! Fortunately, I saw through his bullshit the first time I met him. Me and 3 others were in a show called 100 Proof. It was billed as a "Four-comics who love to drink and tell jokes" show at Cap City Comedy Club. By the second show, Doug, the youngest comic, had been approached by the aforementioned scumbag. He brought with him promises of riches, fame and glory. He talked a good talk, but there was so much about Jake that I didn't like from the moment I laid eyes on him. His shoes looked vaguely familiar - oh yeah...they were ten year old Nikes. What manager from LA wears outdated s**t? I don't know why, but something told me to stay the hell away from this guy. Besides, I didn't like him from word one. "I'm related to Rowen Atkinson. Yeah, he's my cousin, blah-blah...", or when I asked him what he did in LA, he said, "Oh I was the guarantor. I made sure everybody got their money on a film project." Bullshit, I thought. I kindly told him that we weren't interested in his managerial services and thought that was the end of that. Doug and Matt wanted to hear more, so we set up a lunch date because Jake would not f**king back down from "No." I then had to take the lead for the four of us by saying, "Jake, we haven't even gotten this thing (100 Proof Comedy) out of Austin yet and already you're calling Dave Chappelle in Africa, telling him you've got the perfect show lined up for his come back tour?" What the f**k, right? Later that night, Doug goes, "Man, JR, this guy Jake wants to manage me and Scott, and says he knows everybody in Hollywood, and I think I'm gonna give him a shot, and...", to which I replied, "At the end of the night, walk him out to his car. Ask him a few questions about it, too. The next time you see me, tell me what he drives, and what he has to say about it." A few days roll by and Doug calls me to tell me that the whole car thing was the deal breaker for him. "The guy drives a beat up old truck with expired Texas plates! He says he's loaning his sister his car, and he's buying his mom a house, and..." I told Doug I was joking about the whole car thingy, but as it turns out, it helped him make his decision. Jake Atkinson happens to be the biggest f*cking creep I've run across, here in Austin. While there aren't many creeps in Austin to begin with, he takes up fifty people's bad vibes. Again, Gary...I'm so sorry you got scammed by this p***k, but if you need me to help paint a bad-guy character picture, I'd be glad to.