Helene
Elgin,#2Consumer Suggestion
Fri, December 02, 2005
Several things to do when you have telemarketers calling nonstop: 1. Scream into the Phone: " Not now, the cops are kicking in the door. You can't come in here without a warrant." 2. " I told you not to call here no more, fool, somebody has tapped our phones and they are coming to arrest you even as I speak." 3. "I was expecting to hear from you, you sorry no-good ( Fill in with expletives of your choice). How DARE you mess with my ( husband or wife, depending on the gender of the telemarketer.) 4. Nothing except HEAVY BREATHING on the phone. 5. Nothing but GANGSTA RAP MUSIC on the phone until they hang up. 6. "You have reached Oolala's Partyline for Transgendered Adults Only. May I please have your credit-card number?" 7. Tape their spiel and play it back to them ever time they call you. 8. SCREAM LOUDLY! 9. SCREAM LOUDLY " WAS IT AS GOOD FOR YOU AS IT WAS FOR ME!" 10. " I told you punks I can't sell you no dope. The cops are watching the house and they probably got this phone tapped." 11. "I know who you are and I know where you live. I even know where you work and I have friends that you would otherwise only see IN YOUR NIGHTMARES so dont' call here no more!" 12. Gabble away in a foreign language or in gibberish. 13." I was expecting your call. You better call home. Your ( relative of choice) just died and we were trying to contact you." 14. Loudly laugh like a goblin or a ghoul and whisper "Come and see us at the cemetery tonight." Well, this has worked extremely well for me throughout the years. And THEY NEVER CALLED ME AGAIN. I am a little disappointed I never get any telemarketing calls because I enjoy thinking of new ways to bedevil telemarketers and other crank callers.