I was in court on August 17, 2007 regarding gaining custody of my children. Also to continue my order of protection against my ex-boyfriend (Mr. Howard) and to ask to leave the state with my children and to get child support set up.
My attorney Mr. R. Kessinger for one reason or other never brought any of the issues I wanted to the judges attention and told me that he would take care of it all when I if I asked if I could speak. He had informed me it was in my best interest not to speak.
I still as of this date have not received a satisfactory answer. Other than Mr. Kessinger said Mr. Howard in six months would not conform then I would have a better chance of being allowed to leave the state. At that time I had no job and was living off and on at the safe house in Jacksonville, Illinois because of threats toward me from Mr. Howard.
I had a job offer in Florida if I could have gone and Mr. Kessinger was aware of this.
My Counselor at the Safe House and my grandmother wanted to know how Mr. Howard could be given an Order of Protection against me to hold me and my oldest son in the state of Illinois. My mother had already taken the 2 youngest of my children to Florida with her as Mr. Kessinger had told me it would be ok for her to take them and that my oldest son and I would be joining them soon.
I dont understand the Illinois Law which states the abuser will not have any rights to the children in a domestic abuse situation. I understand this is a fairly new law which came into effect January, 2007. I had informed Mr. Kessinger on numerous occasions that I feared for my life and my childrens well being. I was told I had to go to mediation which, I did.
Mr. Howard lied about many things, and his only concern was that he wanted me back. I have stated time and time again I would not under any circumstances return to him. This seems to make him angrier and he never mentions the children.
When he was ordered on August 17, 2007 in court to return the children on August 18, 2007 by 6:00 pm he did not return them. He called at 6:15 pm and stated that he would not be returning them until the next day which was on a Sunday. I then reported this to an officer of South Jacksonville Police Dept. I was then informed by this officer that there was nothing that could be done but he would write it up.
Mr. Howard was also notified by his attorney, this same week, that sleeping with our daughter, who is 8 years old, was to cease immediately. This practice is still going on as of this date.
On August 24, 2007 Mr. Howard called me at 12:15 am intoxicated screaming obscenities. He was angry his attorney had informed him that he was to stop the harassing me. He was also informed he was to bring the children home on time from here on out. Mr. Howard called seven more times that same night so I contacted the South Jacksonville police dept.
An officer was present when Mr. Howard called two more times. I did not answer the phone. The officer did however listen to the messages that were left by Mr. Howard. The officer then did call Mr. Howard and informed him to stop the phone calls and harassment. The officer wrote up a report on this also.
On August 28, 2007 once again Mr. Howard called intoxicated and screaming at me with his girlfriend yelling in the background that she was coming to Jacksonville to kick my (backside). Mr. Howard was angry because it was my weekend to have the children and he was demanding he have them.
September 2, 2007 Mr. Howard once again called me seven times and left nasty messages on my phone. Mr. Kessinger has copies of these messages.
September 16, 2007 when the children were returned to me from their weekend with Mr. Howard, two hours late, the children stated that all he did was fight with his girlfriend and then were clearly upset about the fact that it went on the whole weekend of their visit and Mr. Howard had allowed the girlfriend to call them bad names.
Oct 9th Mr. Howards girlfriend called me and said that Mr. Howard had beat her up and she was pregnant at the time and she wanted to know what all he had done to me.
Oct 14 the 12:02pm Mr. Clifford Howards girlfriend called me because Mr. Howard had hurt our second son's arm by picking him up with one hand and slamming him down in a chair and our daughter and second son both were crying wanting to come home.
November 11, 2007 Mr. Howard called to inform me he wasnt returning the children to me again. I again notified the South Jacksonville police dept. and they in turn called the police dept. in Canton, Illinois to inform Mr. Howard to return the children both police depts wrote up a report. Mr. Kessinger, my attorney was aware of all of these incidents.
November 15, 2007 Mr. Howards girlfriend,17 years of age and now pregnant by Mr. Howard, had one of her friends call threatening that they were all coming to Jacksonville to beat me up. I in turn called an officer to my home. The officer called Mr. Howards girlfriend and informed her to quit calling.
November 18, 2007 Mr. Howard called stating he was going to take me back to court and get full custody of the children., Stated I was an unfit mother.
November 27, 2007 Mr., Howard called at 12:30 am wanted to talk about getting back together I told him we would not discuss this now or ever.
December 25th, 2007 When I called the children at his house (it was his scheduled visitation holiday) my daughter informed me that Mr. Howard and his girlfriend were fighting and the girlfriend had thrown a glass of water at my daughter.
December 27, 2007 Mr. Howard called me to inform me that first son had fallen down some stairs. His hand and was very swollen. I informed Mr. Howard to take first son to the E.R. in Canton. He stated that he would the next day if it was still hurting first son.
I informed him not to wait as he didnt know the extent of the damage to first son's hand. Mr. Howard did and found out it was broken.
December 28, 2007 while Mr. Howard had the children he had a house party with the children present. This included alcohol by his own admission to me.
In the court papers it states that neither parties shall have alcohol while the children are in their care. Mr. Howard is an alcoholic and I fear for my children when he is drinking. He often will become abusive verbally as well as physically while intoxicated.
December 31, 2007 Mr. Howard again had a house party for the New Year with alcohol in the presence of the children.
All of the above has been sent to Mr. Kessingers office. I have left messages and taken in information to Mr. Kessinger since August 17, 2007 and I have yet to receive a response (unknown reason as he has been paid) to any of these problems.
I do understand that for awhile he was ill and unable to attend to any of this but feel that I should have been represented by someone in his absence.
I have only communicated through his secretary and have not received any returned communi from Mr. Kessingers office since the court date and he has all the phone recorded tapes I have recorded.
(I did inform Mr. Howard that I was recording and he said he didnt care.)
Also during Mr. Howards visits with the children he has refused to give the children their daily required medications. First son and second son are on medication for their behavior and first son is on medication for Manic Depression. While he has had the children in his care he has called me a lot of derogatory names as well as telling the children I am gay.
This is also in the court order that this kind of behavior is not to occur.
The children are getting so they cry when I call them when he has visitation and ask me to come get them. Or if they are with me one or two of the children do not want to speak with him. Then when I relay they do not wish to speak to him he calls me some pretty terrible vulgar names.
January 31, 2008 Mr. Howard called and said he wasnt coming after the children because he didnt have the money to feed them.
February 1, 2008 Mr. Howard called and begged me to take him back. He even promised to get me a car if I would come back to him. I told him again for a millionth time that it was over for us. He got quite ugly verbally calling me very vulgar names. Then threatening to take me back to court again because I was an unfit mother and he would be awarded full custody of the children. That I dont pay my bills and Im not holding down a full time job. I hung up on him.
At 10:46 pm his girlfriend called to inform me to stop talking with Mr. Howard and trying to get him back. I hung up on her.
Mr. Howard called and wanted to talk with our daughter and she refused to talk with her father and he became angry and very verbally abusive again so I hung up the phone so our daughter could not hear.
When I found out he knew where I live now I went to the safe house to stay as I was afraid he would return to my residence.
The children and I still attend the group meetings on Wednesdays at the safe house, when I dont have to work. The children are also still in the counseling there also. I did go to the Housing and informed them of the incident on January 18, 2008 and they sent a No Trespassing order for Mr. Howard.
I have nowhere else to turn. I am in fear of mine and my childrens welfare/lives.
I feel that the Justice System has totally failed my children and me. Mr. Howard has violated almost everything in the court order and the protection order. He is threatening and harassing me he has not been picked up for any of the violations.
If there is any justice to help me I pray you will find it for my children and me.
I hope and pray to be free to build a life for my children and myself in a safe environment and around family. I have none in Illinois.
Mr. Kessinger has not taken an interest in my case since August. There are no monies owed to him for my case so I do not understand the problem. I did only receive a letter stating that I owed $105.00 for my mediation which I was given a price at the time of the mediation and had to have it paid before the mediation appointment could take place. This was too paid to the mediator.
Michelle
Jacksonville, Illinois
U.S.A.
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