Complaint Review: Jason Grant Owings - Independence Missouri

Why is this report not accurate?

In domestic situations such as this, it is often difficult to establish which party has committed more wrong-doing. Where is the proof? Obviously this woman believes her son is being neglected/cheated by his father's absence; But what we as readers do not know is how or why that might be the case.

There are many aspects to consider- women can be equally as ruthless as men in relationships- so there is a good possibility the father was shunned and even more likely forced to abandon the idea of having a relationship with his child due to the volatile relationship with the child's mother. In extreme cases it isn't unusual for the mother to exercise her control by not allowing the father to visit etc. This is termed power currency. So it may be true, the father may not have supported the child monetarily even though it is apparent the child has special needs- the question is why? 

There are many potential reasons for the father to avoid contact or in other words be "absent." It is fairly clear just from reading the short, pointed accusation that the mother herself is not strong in her ability to build a convincible argument, but rather relies on sniping (avoiding conflict by communicating in a negative fashion and then abandoning the encounter by physically leaving the scene or refusing to interact further), she most definitely displays what is termed 'kitchen sinking' (A response to a conflict in which one person uses accusations that have very little to do with the disagreement at hand) by mentioning the living with a prostitute, treating himself to a new truck, and worst of all the comment "that kid should die anyway." This is not behavior of a well-adjusted person and there is no proof to substantiate these accusations.

Is it not possible this father realized he was playing a part in an all too familiar role, that of a complimentary relationship in other words, he may have learned that the Relationship was characterized by an unequal balance of power, which lead to domination by one or both parties involved, making the dance of cumulative annoyance (A buildup of repressed annoyances that grows as the mental list of grievances we have against our partner grows) and demand-withdraw pattern (A way of handling conflicts that is linked to gender roles. For example, a man retreats in response to a woman confronting him) too much to bare, so he fled for his own self-preservation. Some might argue that if this were the case then he should have obtained custody- but this is not an easy task for a man to achieve. Especially if he also suffers from being inept in relationships to begin with.

The simple fact is the father is unable to disprove these allegations because for whatever reason he has been excluded from his child's life. It is impossible to solve an equation if you do not have the value of x, that being said, however wrong it seems that this father is not participating/supporting his disabled child will remain a mystery; Considering the depiction the mother created in her post, it would not be surprising that mental illness plays a large role in the conflict here as well as low emotional intelligence on the mother's part and both parties ignorance in creating a child from such an unstable foundation.

It is always important to remember there are two sides to every story, and this is solely from the mother's perspective. 

           - I have a BA in English with a minor in communications, I have studied interpersonal communications at length, and these situations are all too common. 

 

A genetic test was done. on both of us. as for a background check, hindsight is 20/20. I am only concerned with what I CAN DO NOW not wat I should have dne. Maybe someone else will learn from this

THIS MAN WHO ALLEGEDLY FATHERED THIS CHILD IS JUST A SPERM DONOR, ONE OF THOSE GUYS WHO WANDERS IN AND OUT OF WOMENS' BEDS LEAVING APPARENTLY DEFECTIVE GENETICS WHEREVER HE GOES. I HAVE HEARD ABOUT PEOPLE LIKE THOSE. THEY USUALLY HAVE EXTENSIVE POLICE RECORDS AND INDICATIONS THAT THEY ARE NOT GOING TO BE THE BEST OF ALL HUSBANDS AND FATHERS... ER, HE NEVER MARRIED THE CHILD'S MOTHER SO THAT WAY HE FELT HE COULD JUST MOVE ON BECAUSE THERE WAS NO LEGAL OBLIGATION TO SUPPORT ANYBODY. THIS IS A COMMON LAW HILLBILLY DIVORCE! THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED BY NOT SHACKING UP WITH SOMEONE UNTIL YOU WERE MARRIED. OLD FASHIONED BUT IT DOES TEND TO PROTECT THE CHILD A LOT BETTER THAN HAVING TO HUNT HIM DOWN FOR A PATERNITY TEST AND THEN TRYING TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT. THIS GUY IS OBVIOUSLY SOME CRETIN WHO HIDES UNDER THE TRASH LIKE A COCKROACH AND NOT SUPPORT HIS SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD. WE DO NOT KNOW WHY THE CHILD IS SPECIAL NEEDS? DID THIS GUY BEAT HIS KID UP AND CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE OR WAS IT CAUSED BY SOME SORT OF GENETIC PROBLEM WHICH YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN A GENETIC SCREENING BEFORE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED HAVING CHILDREN? USED TO BE IF YOU APPLIED FOR FOOD STAMPS, THE AFDC PEOPLE WOULD FIND THE DEADBEAT DAD AND MAKE HIM PAY FOR ALL OF THE FOOD STAMPS AND ANY OTHER MEDICAL EXPENSES THAT THE STATE HAD TO SPEND ON THE UPKEEP OF THE CHILD --AND THE MOTHER. YOU DID APPLY FOR FOOD STAMPS DIDN'T YOU. IT WON'T COST YOU ANYTHING FOR THEM TO HUNT HIM DOWN AND THEY HAVE WAYS OF FINDING HIM! MAYBE THE ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE IN YOUR STATE HAS A CHILD ENFORCEMENT DIVISION THAT WILL HUNT HIM DOWN AND JAIL HIM OR MAKE HIM PAY. I WOULD TRY TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT THAT YOU HAVE COMING TO YOU AND IF YOUR CHILD'S HANDICAPS ARE GENETIC, YOU NEED TO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TOO BECAUSE IF THEY HAVE A KID WITH THIS SPERM DONOR TOO, THEY MIGHT BE DISABLED AS WELL. PEOPLE HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING. GOOD LUCK.

THIS MAN WHO ALLEGEDLY FATHERED THIS CHILD IS JUST A SPERM DONOR, ONE OF THOSE GUYS WHO WANDERS IN AND OUT OF WOMENS' BEDS LEAVING APPARENTLY DEFECTIVE GENETICS WHEREVER HE GOES. I HAVE HEARD ABOUT PEOPLE LIKE THOSE. THEY USUALLY HAVE EXTENSIVE POLICE RECORDS AND INDICATIONS THAT THEY ARE NOT GOING TO BE THE BEST OF ALL HUSBANDS AND FATHERS... ER, HE NEVER MARRIED THE CHILD'S MOTHER SO THAT WAY HE FELT HE COULD JUST MOVE ON BECAUSE THERE WAS NO LEGAL OBLIGATION TO SUPPORT ANYBODY. THIS IS A COMMON LAW HILLBILLY DIVORCE! THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED BY NOT SHACKING UP WITH SOMEONE UNTIL YOU WERE MARRIED. OLD FASHIONED BUT IT DOES TEND TO PROTECT THE CHILD A LOT BETTER THAN HAVING TO HUNT HIM DOWN FOR A PATERNITY TEST AND THEN TRYING TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT. THIS GUY IS OBVIOUSLY SOME CRETIN WHO HIDES UNDER THE TRASH LIKE A COCKROACH AND NOT SUPPORT HIS SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD. WE DO NOT KNOW WHY THE CHILD IS SPECIAL NEEDS? DID THIS GUY BEAT HIS KID UP AND CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE OR WAS IT CAUSED BY SOME SORT OF GENETIC PROBLEM WHICH YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN A GENETIC SCREENING BEFORE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED HAVING CHILDREN? USED TO BE IF YOU APPLIED FOR FOOD STAMPS, THE AFDC PEOPLE WOULD FIND THE DEADBEAT DAD AND MAKE HIM PAY FOR ALL OF THE FOOD STAMPS AND ANY OTHER MEDICAL EXPENSES THAT THE STATE HAD TO SPEND ON THE UPKEEP OF THE CHILD --AND THE MOTHER. YOU DID APPLY FOR FOOD STAMPS DIDN'T YOU. IT WON'T COST YOU ANYTHING FOR THEM TO HUNT HIM DOWN AND THEY HAVE WAYS OF FINDING HIM! MAYBE THE ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE IN YOUR STATE HAS A CHILD ENFORCEMENT DIVISION THAT WILL HUNT HIM DOWN AND JAIL HIM OR MAKE HIM PAY. I WOULD TRY TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT THAT YOU HAVE COMING TO YOU AND IF YOUR CHILD'S HANDICAPS ARE GENETIC, YOU NEED TO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TOO BECAUSE IF THEY HAVE A KID WITH THIS SPERM DONOR TOO, THEY MIGHT BE DISABLED AS WELL. PEOPLE HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING. GOOD LUCK.

THIS MAN WHO ALLEGEDLY FATHERED THIS CHILD IS JUST A SPERM DONOR, ONE OF THOSE GUYS WHO WANDERS IN AND OUT OF WOMENS' BEDS LEAVING APPARENTLY DEFECTIVE GENETICS WHEREVER HE GOES. I HAVE HEARD ABOUT PEOPLE LIKE THOSE. THEY USUALLY HAVE EXTENSIVE POLICE RECORDS AND INDICATIONS THAT THEY ARE NOT GOING TO BE THE BEST OF ALL HUSBANDS AND FATHERS... ER, HE NEVER MARRIED THE CHILD'S MOTHER SO THAT WAY HE FELT HE COULD JUST MOVE ON BECAUSE THERE WAS NO LEGAL OBLIGATION TO SUPPORT ANYBODY. THIS IS A COMMON LAW HILLBILLY DIVORCE! THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED BY NOT SHACKING UP WITH SOMEONE UNTIL YOU WERE MARRIED. OLD FASHIONED BUT IT DOES TEND TO PROTECT THE CHILD A LOT BETTER THAN HAVING TO HUNT HIM DOWN FOR A PATERNITY TEST AND THEN TRYING TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT. THIS GUY IS OBVIOUSLY SOME CRETIN WHO HIDES UNDER THE TRASH LIKE A COCKROACH AND NOT SUPPORT HIS SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD. WE DO NOT KNOW WHY THE CHILD IS SPECIAL NEEDS? DID THIS GUY BEAT HIS KID UP AND CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE OR WAS IT CAUSED BY SOME SORT OF GENETIC PROBLEM WHICH YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN A GENETIC SCREENING BEFORE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED HAVING CHILDREN? USED TO BE IF YOU APPLIED FOR FOOD STAMPS, THE AFDC PEOPLE WOULD FIND THE DEADBEAT DAD AND MAKE HIM PAY FOR ALL OF THE FOOD STAMPS AND ANY OTHER MEDICAL EXPENSES THAT THE STATE HAD TO SPEND ON THE UPKEEP OF THE CHILD --AND THE MOTHER. YOU DID APPLY FOR FOOD STAMPS DIDN'T YOU. IT WON'T COST YOU ANYTHING FOR THEM TO HUNT HIM DOWN AND THEY HAVE WAYS OF FINDING HIM! MAYBE THE ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE IN YOUR STATE HAS A CHILD ENFORCEMENT DIVISION THAT WILL HUNT HIM DOWN AND JAIL HIM OR MAKE HIM PAY. I WOULD TRY TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT THAT YOU HAVE COMING TO YOU AND IF YOUR CHILD'S HANDICAPS ARE GENETIC, YOU NEED TO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TOO BECAUSE IF THEY HAVE A KID WITH THIS SPERM DONOR TOO, THEY MIGHT BE DISABLED AS WELL. PEOPLE HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING. GOOD LUCK.

THIS MAN WHO ALLEGEDLY FATHERED THIS CHILD IS JUST A SPERM DONOR, ONE OF THOSE GUYS WHO WANDERS IN AND OUT OF WOMENS' BEDS LEAVING APPARENTLY DEFECTIVE GENETICS WHEREVER HE GOES. I HAVE HEARD ABOUT PEOPLE LIKE THOSE. THEY USUALLY HAVE EXTENSIVE POLICE RECORDS AND INDICATIONS THAT THEY ARE NOT GOING TO BE THE BEST OF ALL HUSBANDS AND FATHERS... ER, HE NEVER MARRIED THE CHILD'S MOTHER SO THAT WAY HE FELT HE COULD JUST MOVE ON BECAUSE THERE WAS NO LEGAL OBLIGATION TO SUPPORT ANYBODY. THIS IS A COMMON LAW HILLBILLY DIVORCE! THIS COULD HAVE BEEN AVOIDED BY NOT SHACKING UP WITH SOMEONE UNTIL YOU WERE MARRIED. OLD FASHIONED BUT IT DOES TEND TO PROTECT THE CHILD A LOT BETTER THAN HAVING TO HUNT HIM DOWN FOR A PATERNITY TEST AND THEN TRYING TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT. THIS GUY IS OBVIOUSLY SOME CRETIN WHO HIDES UNDER THE TRASH LIKE A COCKROACH AND NOT SUPPORT HIS SPECIAL NEEDS CHILD. WE DO NOT KNOW WHY THE CHILD IS SPECIAL NEEDS? DID THIS GUY BEAT HIS KID UP AND CAUSE BRAIN DAMAGE OR WAS IT CAUSED BY SOME SORT OF GENETIC PROBLEM WHICH YOU SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN A GENETIC SCREENING BEFORE YOU EVEN CONSIDERED HAVING CHILDREN? USED TO BE IF YOU APPLIED FOR FOOD STAMPS, THE AFDC PEOPLE WOULD FIND THE DEADBEAT DAD AND MAKE HIM PAY FOR ALL OF THE FOOD STAMPS AND ANY OTHER MEDICAL EXPENSES THAT THE STATE HAD TO SPEND ON THE UPKEEP OF THE CHILD --AND THE MOTHER. YOU DID APPLY FOR FOOD STAMPS DIDN'T YOU. IT WON'T COST YOU ANYTHING FOR THEM TO HUNT HIM DOWN AND THEY HAVE WAYS OF FINDING HIM! MAYBE THE ATTORNEY GENERAL'S OFFICE IN YOUR STATE HAS A CHILD ENFORCEMENT DIVISION THAT WILL HUNT HIM DOWN AND JAIL HIM OR MAKE HIM PAY. I WOULD TRY TO COLLECT THE CHILD SUPPORT THAT YOU HAVE COMING TO YOU AND IF YOUR CHILD'S HANDICAPS ARE GENETIC, YOU NEED TO TELL PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TOO BECAUSE IF THEY HAVE A KID WITH THIS SPERM DONOR TOO, THEY MIGHT BE DISABLED AS WELL. PEOPLE HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING. GOOD LUCK.