Stacey
Dallas,#2Consumer Comment
Mon, July 25, 2011
Once again you cannot blame a whole entity for the actions of individuals. LIke I stated - seek counseling, a good Divorce Attorney - if you do not wish to be divorced then seek counseling for yourself. You cannot force someone else to seek help but you can get help for yourself. Good luck to you.
Robert
Irvine,#3Consumer Comment
Fri, July 22, 2011
I can handle the idea of an affair
- Actually I don't think you can. I am going to avoid tackling the "consensual" nature that an affair requires as much as possible, because I don't think what anyone says is going to change your thought your husband didn't do anything wrong. Your novels are basically saying all the same thing. You are upset that your husband left you and you want someone else(other than your husband) to take the blame.
Based on what you posted here you are trying to put all of the blame on the Nurse and Hospital. Where because of this affair you are trying to hold the hospital responsible for your expenses. You are trying to equate a hospital being held responsible for a nurse giving the wrong medication with a hospital being held responsible for a nurse that decides to have an affair. Those are NOT equal.
As soon as the hospital was made aware of the situation according to your first report she lost her job. You apparently are a nurse and know that a complaint with the State Board of Nursing will go on her record and can be seen by any prospective employer. You are not going to be able to make a claim that the hospital should have known that this nurse may have an affair and they should have taken action before it happened.
But if you really think that the hospital should be held responsible then sue them. Although if you get a lawyer do not pay them any money up front. If you do there is a good chance that you will be here in a few months about how your lawyer didn't know the law and lost your "slam dunk" case. If you can't find a lawyer to take your case on contingency that should tell you how much of a case you actually have.
I do hope everything works out but you need to take a step back and realize that there is one person who needs to have some of the blame and it is not the nurse or the hospital.
dadda
bourbon,#4Author of original report
Fri, July 22, 2011
As I noted in a previous reply, sexual misconduct is prohibited. In code, there is no clause (that I have been made aware of) that "permits" or "excuses" sexual misconduct based on the theory of "consensuality". The reason that it is not defensible or excusable is the patient is considered "vulnerable" without taking any of his/her medical conditions (including mental status) or medications into consideration. There is an inherent power & knowledge imbalance and there is something called "duty of care", which both the nurse and hospital owe to the patient. Therefore, even asking a patient for a date falls under "sexual misconduct", as is noted on the Washington State information I provided earlier: "romantic relationship" is prohibited. The information does not say anything about the competency of a patient.
I did not have an expectation that the hospital should know every action taken by each of their employees, but I made a complaint, provided clear and irrefutable evidence of misconduct, and requested the hospital mitigate the harm done by their employee. None of this was done in an adversarial way. As it stands, I am absorbing medical expenses for two daughters who have exhibited stress-induced symptoms, I'm in the midst of a divorce and having to absorb legal fees due to a husband who has been and is acting irrationally and of course, I'm going to counseling myself to cope with the unexpected cause of the divorce and the divorce itself. Fine; I understand that nobody gives a darn and I understand that this could happen to somebody else. I understand the "bottom line" (liability) is the reason that the hospital has, except for terminating the nurse's employment, ignored the negative repercussions of her actions on my family. And by the way, I understand that she has cooled or ended her involvement with him. I don't know for sure, because I've had to get a restraining order against him because of his unstable emotions and actions. Really nice outcome of care.
"An employer is liable for harm done by the employee within the scope
of employment, whether the act was accidental or reckless. The employer
is even responsible for intentional wrongs if they are committed, at
least in part, on the employer's behalf. For example, a bill collector
who commits ASSAULT AND BATTERY to extract an overdue payment subjects the employer to legal liability.
Where the employer is someone who legally owes a duty of special care
and protection, such as a common carrier (airplane, bus, passenger
train), motel owner, or a hospital, the employer is usually liable to
the customer or patient even if the employee acts for purely personal
reasons. The theory underlying such liability is that employers should
not hire dangerous people and expose the public to a risk while the
employee is under the employer's supervision.
The employer may also be liable for her own actions, such as in
hiring a diagnosed psychopath to be an armed guard. An employer,
therefore, can be liable for her own carelessness and as a principal
whose employee is an agent.
These rules do not allow the employee to evade responsibility for
harm she has caused. Injured parties generally sue both the employee and
employer, but because the employee usually is unable to afford to pay
the amount of damages awarded in a lawsuit, the employer is the party
who is more likely to pay."
Read more: Respondeat Superior - When Is An Employee On The Job? - Employer, Employment, Scope, Liable, Actions, and Agent http://law.jrank.org/pages/9834/Respondeat-Superior.html#ixzz1SpvWyOVj
mr rik
miami,#5Consumer Comment
Sun, June 05, 2011
if you can't pork a nurse?
Stacey
Dallas,#6Consumer Comment
Sun, June 05, 2011
Let me explain without writing a novel like you did. Ethics and morals are instilled in a person through
learning not through behaviors. If so the 1/2 of the world would be corrupt. You once again cannot blame
the Hospital for the actions of their employees - I am sure (just going with knowledge) that the Nurse
signed (upon becoming and employee) a moral clause and continued CEU classes as required.
Therefore you cannot (once again) blame the Hospital. I work for a company that owns many Hospitals and from experience there is no way that that all Hospitals can keep taps on all their employees.
Please blame the individuals involved - your HUSBAND and the NURSE. I suggest you seek counseling and a good Divorce Attorney.
And yes - I am educated in the Social Work Field. Does not mean I am perfect and flawless. No one is.
Place blame where blame lies.
dadda
bourbon,#7Author of original report
Sun, June 05, 2011
Stacy, I can handle the idea of an affair, because it's not necessarily "about me". In fact, I realized that the stress of my husband's severe and chronic medical problems had affected me; differently than my husband, of course, or our children. We are now in our mid-40s. People can and do have heart attacks that kill or nearly kill them at our age, but it's not the norm. My husband got the wound by going for a 15-20 minute walk with a friend of his. A blister that festered into an open wound....he didn't know a thing about it until he ran a high fever several weeks later. He can't feel anything in his feet and other areas. I don't know what it's like, but it's probably not pleasant to live with constant reminders of your mortality and (very) shortened life expectancy.
At any rate, my husband required originally 6 weeks, then more, of IV therapy. Twice a day, two hours at a time. My husband has Medicare and they REQUIRED him to get it at a site with "physician supervision". Otherwise, no reason he couldn't have done it at home. And of course, there was never a physician physically supervising a thing while he was there. That's the only reason the two crossed paths to begin with.
I don't know if you are a social worker; if so, you have an ethical code and practice guidelines. You most likely have knowledge of things people do to "cope" with problems. Some turn to drugs or alcohol, some shop, eat, some have sex. I didn't post the full letter, obviously, but it is very clear who instigated the relationship, pursued the relationship and there was only one person who was responsible for maintaining boundaries. That is the nurse...and the nurse is employed by the hospital. Am I placing any blame? No; merely relating facts ... the nurse and hospital are in a position of exercising fiduciary duty to patients in their care: "Since its beginning, the purpose of organized medical care has been to help people, if possible, recover from illness or infirmity. Included in this mission is the obligation owed to the patient and the organization, or fiduciary duty. Fiduciary duty is an obligation to act in the best interest of a person or organization." (MedSurg Nursing, Aug 2002 http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0FSS/is_4_11/ai_n18613919/)
There are very good reasons for the prohibition: the nurse/patient relationship ISN'T equal. Patients come in for care with all types of conditions, mental states, drug regimens and other attendant "baggage" and relationships. Nurses are educated, earn a degree, and are trusted to exercise a high degree of skill, knowledge and judgment. They are also entrusted with a great deal of PERSONAL information about you, the patient. Which includes financial and employment data, relationship and religious information, your personal habits....it would be easy to pick and choose, if boundaries aren't established and honored. A nurse who wants a new, richer husband (or wife)? One who wants to choose somebody "unlikely to tell"? I don't know any nurses that think that way, but it wouldn't be a profession and scientific field of endeavor in those circumstances. People who are taking (especially) multiple medications may experience side effects, including idiosyncratic effects. Can you really say the patient is in full possession of his/her faculties when they may be worried, depressed, angry or a combination...from the effects of an accident or illness and other areas of their lives impacted by it? At any rate, who's going to be liable when a patient gets an STD from an encounter with a health care professional? The main point: First, do no harm. Then, continue process. What possible BENEFIT is the patient going to realize from such an encounter?
And you are right about one thing: my husband did leave. Why? Maybe he was having little fantasies about this wonderful, knowledgeable person who ALWAYS has a smile, nicely dressed and coiffed, never had an argument with him in his life or disagreed, laughed at every corny joke...maybe she does want to be my wife! (And I am going to compete with that-the fantasy of the perfect woman, always there for him?) Well, it's been 8 months since he filed; she hasn't done a thing. Where does that leave him, except looking stupid, destroyed his marriage & finances, his children are devastated at clay feet they never dreamed of...acting very much unlike his normal self. Of course, he did have to have part of his foot amputated last month, cause there was nobody around to check for infection and his eyesight isn't such that he can do it himself....
Is it really to much to expect that the hospital maybe do a bit of damage control? Washington state has a very clear model which I'll include...there are penalties to the nurse for such misconduct...including for "romantic relationship". So don't chastise me; I didn't make the rules. As a nurse, I knew they existed. I merely want something sensible: for someone (a social worker?) to sit down with my husband and me and go over some of this...my husband showed a very high score on the Beck Depression Inventory; moderate to severe depression can cause people to feel (undue) guilt/shame and many other negative thoughts. The nurse was responsible for STOPPING this BEFORE it ever started. The hospital has a certain (direct) duty, in terms of hiring practices, training and supervision of providing competent staff to care for patients. They are aware of what happened and protect their interests while they turn a blind eye to the damage caused to patient and family. Would it be alright if it were your little boy or girl it happened to? Or your unconscious mother? Or anyone else? I don't want to come across as rude, but nurses are held to a higher than "common law" level of behavior...just because affairs are acceptable, apparently, in some segments of society at large, does not make them desirable or acceptable, EVER, in the health care setting. Most nurses, to my knowledge, do not pursue relationships, sexual or otherwise, with patients. In fact, my original complaint to hospital and state included my hope that the nurse receive help to deal with her personal/psychological issues. I wasn't "angry" in the usual sense, although I would never say that it's been enjoyable to deal with this. As a matter of fact, some patients end up DEAD as a result of these "consensual" liaisons. And if my husband keeps up the way he has been , he's likely enough to have another heart attack and end up that way, himself.
A bit more from MedSurg Nursing: "There are inherent problems with public disclosure of medical mistakes because it can result in compromising an administrator's duty to the organization with little or no benefit to the patient. Health care staff have responsibility for protecting the organization from harmful situations. If public disclosure of medical mistakes places the organization at risk for financial and legal consequences but does not insure patient safety, the staff has compromised both without good cause."
And: "...research indicates that while 98% of patients want to know about all medical mistakes involving them, they were less likely to consider legal action if the mistakes were disclosed." (Nowicki, 1998)
I merely wanted someone to take their responsibility seriously, do the right thing...apparently, they terminated the nurse...so now I get yelled at for "ruining her life." Apparently, nobody is going to set my husband straight. She was ruining her own life and got him involved. Unfortunately, our children and I are just a bit of collateral damage ... no consensuality here.
Stacey
Dallas,#8Consumer Comment
Sat, June 04, 2011
Your Husband's behavior had nothing to do with his treatment or medication but had to do with wanting out of the marriage. HE had the affair - HE left you and HE is responsible for HIS own actions not the Hospital. I suggest that you blame your HUSBAND for his actions. Think about it. A first year Social Work Student could pick this out of a hat!!
dadda
bourbon,#9Author of original report
Sat, June 04, 2011
Mr. Rik, I saw your comment; I'm not sure that I understand it. I'm going to use another example to try to illustrate the point. If an employee at the hospital gave medication to a patient that caused harm (long-lasting) or cut out an organ by mistake from inside, so that you don't know it's not there anymore, would it be ethical and best practice to let the patient go on their way, suffering from the effects? If they left something inside you during surgery and discovered that during an x-ray, would it be ethical and best practice to keep the patient in the dark? I think not, those types of ideas are fairly easy to grasp.
The State Board of Nursing sent out its regular magazine to all nurses in the state not too long ago with an article on boundaries and the harm that can come to patients when those boundaries are violated. The first person I spoke with at the hospital acknowledged that what I was describing as having occurred was a serious breach of protocol, so the hospital is not ignorant. In one national study, >80-90% of patients demonstrated ill effects from sexual relationship with a health care provider. And I doubt many people would feel comfortable with the idea that "all's fair" at the hospital...I'm a nurse and never have I come across a situation like this. The National Council of State Boards of Nursing reports that sexual misconduct is a very small percentage (0.57% in a ten year period ending in 2009) of total licensing complaints. They also report some of the side effects: major depressive disorder, suicidal ideation, PTSD, dissociation, relationship problems, failure to access health care services when needed... need I continue? Those are significant and serious side effects, to say the least. It seems unconscionable that a hospital could have this occur on their campus, be informed and take whatever action they deem necessary to protect their interests, yet leave the patient (and family) to fend for themselves. If nothing else, I am going to work toward this being part of the Patient Bill of Rights or being more publicized. Every health care profession addresses it at some level; it's the patients and families who are left in the dark. This is not a blatant assault, it's more like molestation. The victim is selected, groomed and basically, becomes a part of the perpetrator's narrative. Male victims have some of the same problems as females, including "taking responsibility" for their victimization, but they have additional difficulties, both in identifying as victims and obtaining knowledgeable treatment. The hospital could at least give him the information he needs to decide for himself...he is still receiving treatment there. Since he is not living at home, more $$ are being made on dressing changes and wound monitoring that they now have had to provide on a much more frequent basis.
mr rik
miami,#10Consumer Comment
Fri, June 03, 2011
TAKE CARE of things at home.
Don't have these problems.