Complaint Review: Suffolk County Family Court - Islip Terrace New York

I can't believe all the cheap a**es on this site! Thinking that women are getting some great deal out of having custody of their children and "stealing" a poor man's money. What a crock of sh*t! I work with families on a daily basis. Most of the women I work with get $200 a month for 1-3 kids. Do you really think that you can adequately take care of a child on $17-$50 a week? Okay, and say a woman does work, let's double that so each parent is taking care of half of the expenses. Do you think $35-$50 a week would cut it? Childcare tuition in the cheapest places is $100 a week per child! That right there eats up more than the child support. So essentially if a woman wants to work, she needs to pay for childcare at $400-$900 a month. Then she is supposed to pay for all the rent, bills, etc. just because men don't want to part with a precious few dollars? TIGHT A**ES. And as far as women just giving up custody of their children so they don't have to "take" a man's money...do you know how many fathers don't even want their children? What would you suggest in those cases? Like the OP said as well...would you send your child to live with an abusive parent? Should a child be punished because he doesn't want to let go of $200 a month? Believe me, it costs FAR more money to raise a child than to pay child support. That's if they even pay it! How would you feel as a father of a child if the courts said that your baby had to go live with an abusive drug addicted woman? Would you want that? I'm sure you'd want support from the woman if you were the one with physical custody as well. What I dont' get is why people don't WANT to support their kids. Pretty heartless to be so selfish as to only think of yourself if you ask me. Is it that child's fault that you are too stupid to wrap your sh*t before getting your jollies? Men have just as much of a responsibility in having children as women. I am 100% for complete sharing of expenses and no support if both parents are equally spending as much time with the children and equally supporting the children. Nothing wrong with that at all. Women may be able to have an abortion or not, which yes is giving them the choice to have the baby or not. But...a man makes a choice when he doesn't take the proper precautions. I highly doubt if there is a single man out there paying support on a child who didn't know that by sticking his p***s in a female's vagina that she could get pregnant.

After reading your statements. Understand there are generally 3 side to the story, Yours, His, and the Truth. Any Judge or non-participating 3rd party (attorneys NOT included) generally form their own conclusions based upon the facts presented. You spent $25,000 to get child supprt. Your attorney should be shot, and so should you. Then another $5,000 again. You need to come to terms with your ex-husband and get past the issues of the divorce. Move on.....What did your ex-husband spend to defend, and ultimately beat your bogus motions through the court? I find that most people, men and women alike are petty at best in a divorce, and even more so when children are involved. At least on side wants MORE than they are legally entitled to. And what still gets me is WHY either party is entitled to an equity share in the other persons belongings or earnings. Go out GET a job, and support yourself and children. Marriage is not a career, and it certainly is not a pay day when it ends. The person that brings on a case without merit should have to pay 100% of ALL legal fees. And if one party does not work, well then get a job and pay your own legal bills. If the party which brings the suit is the one not working, you best get a job. The idea that a man is resp. for ALL finances is archaic. Why because a man has different plumbing than a woman. Women are just as abusive, and mean as men have ever been. In some cases even more so. Take responsability, I am sure yoiur ex didn't come home at night after working and say well the moon is out lets give the wife a beating. What did you do to get smacked. Not that it is acceptable to hit, but maybe you slapped first, or threw a plate, or a cup? I am sure there is much more to the story. As for Suffolk County Judges, WAY TO GO!! It is about time women don;t get the golden ticket because they are women!!

I have to say that after working for the Child Support Enforcement Bureau in Suffolk County a few years ago, I heard a lot of sad stories.. both from men and women in all walks of life. I too have a child support case with them, and I am a lucky one, I get paid regularly and my daughter's father is very involved with her life. On the other hand, I believe in fairness and because of this, I never persued any child support from my older daughter's father, yes, a different man. This man never wanted children, but we BOTH played and I got pregnant. I strongly believe that women have a freedom of choice whether or not to have a child, but men do not. I gave this man a choice and he wants no involvement with me or her. When we run into eachother from time to time, he always asks if I need anything and if she is ok. It's truely a shame because he is a great guy and probably would have been a wonderful father, but he made is choice and has since married - and has no children. So much for my life story... I think it's unfair to put the entire judicial system on the chopping block. I had to sit in a courtroom and listen to new and old child support cases as part of my job training. My job was to answer calls at the CSEB, up to 100 each day for each of us working there. On the phone and in the courtroom, there were no 2 cases alike. The people that are lucky and get what they agreed on never call. The poor guy who just lost his job and is afraid he will go to jail because he cannot pay (this is only done in extreme violations), to the woman who is living in her car with 2 kids because her ex-husband hasn't paid in months, to the men who have custody of their children and are trying to get an increase in child support. Every case is different and there are always 2 sides to every story. We are all seeing just one side of this woman's story here. Divorce cases are different than family court cases, although both involve child support. I agree with the chauvenistic pig that the courts are unfair to the absent parent, but he is wrong in thinking that only women receive child support. A lot of women are giving up their kids to their ex's for all different reasons, but most commonly because they want to persue a career. In NY State, the law says child support must be paid until the child turns 21, UNLESS the child moves out and is supporting him/her self, or has joined the military, or has become emancipated. It does NOT say the absent parent HAS to pay for college, child care, medical, dental, sports equipment or anything else. Some of these can be added to a support order. The law also does not say that the money received by the custodial parent has to go completely for the child. That money can be spent on paying rent, mortgage, oil, gas, food, or any other household type bills. Also, an increase in a man's/woman's paycheck does not automatically entitle the custodial parent to more child support. BOTH his and her salaries are considered before an increase in family court. In divorce cases, both salaries are considered right from the start. As far as bashing this woman or any others for illegitimate children, find a classroom and do a show of hands to see just many of the children today were born into wedloc. Neither of mine were, but they always had a loving supportive home life and that's what should always be the bottom line. CSEB says that an absent parent has to pay 17% of their salary, after taxes, for just one child. I have no idea where this figure came from, but look at the $ we are talking about here. This woman's exhusband's self worth is over $4 million, but this scale is based only on his current salary. I think she should consider herself lucky to have anything at all, most importantly that SHE remembers the kids birthdays, school functions, etc... not him. He has walked, except it and love your children. And as far as I know, if something should happen to him, your children would be entitled to his estate. They will profit then, in the meantime it shouldn't be about the money, although we all know it IS about the money, but invest it for their futures, and work harder so you can make more money and give your children what they need and deserve. the children will know, without being told, where the money came from for all the things they need. PS, what kind of money do you make? Islip Terrace isn't a cheap town to live in. Maybe you can cut expenses by considering a move?

First, whoever Bobbi in Islip Terrace is, you certainly don't know me. I don't know if you were joking in your response or you really know someone with the mailman's kids, but take your white trash attitude and lifestyle and shove it. Illegitimate kids, probations officers and Jenny Jones certainly play no role in my life. If they play a role in your life, God bless you, you have no real quality life. To the rest of you, you obviously have had your own bad experiences. I'm not saying that all dads are deadbeats. I certainly know of a few mom's who play the role pretty well; and I certainly know several dads who are divorced, pay their child support, interact well with their kids and ex-wife and just act like civil human beings. If my ex-husband wasn't physically abusive in our marriage maybe we would still be together. The fact remains, and it is documented in court with photographs and police reports, the man is violent. Would you leave custody of your kids to someone like that? I wouldn't. My kids mean the world to me. He alienated his own son early on and has not spoken with him in years. He recently turned his violent nature on his daughter (who I might add was the epitome of Daddy's Little Girl). She was so scared and upset. She hasn't seen or even spoke with him in about 6 weeks - and you would think he would call her. Nothing. She's devastated. This is not a quality human being we're talking about. Would you give custody to a man (or a woman) like that without a fight? Sure, that would be the easy and cheap thing to do, but could you live with yourself if you allowed that to happen? The fact remains, they are his children, and he should help to support them. Period. Any man, or woman, who feels they can and should just abandon their children are low-lifes. There are plenty of good dads out there, but you guys come off as the bad guys here. Maybe you should do some soul searching and put more effort into having the best relationship with your kids that you can. Once you've lost them, you've lost them. I have kept my mouth shut about my ex-husbands shennanigans for years. My kids knew nothing about what went on behind the scenes, how that they're older they're beginning to catch on. My ex-husband did this to himself. He has spent the last 12 years trying to ruin our lives rather than enjoy his own. I'll tell you, you'll all die lonely, bitter, old men with no one who cares about you. Is it worth it? By the sound of you guys here, it seems it is. As for us, screw him, screw New York. We're happy, we're healthy, and we have each other - but we're certainly leaving New York.

I know you! Why don't you tell these people why your babydaddy won't pay? Hint hint people: the kids look more like the mailman than him! The only time he gets custody of the kids is when she does her community service on the weekends. I konw because I play bridge with the probashin officer. She's trying to get on Jenny Jones with her story but so far no luck!

Ok first of all, I find it unfair that guys always have to pay child support. Whatever happened to woman paying child support? You never see that now adays. Woman get away with the most grotesque things and the man still gets blamed. "She wasn't happy with the marriage so she got a divorce and got half of HIS (not hers) but his stuff even though he payed for all of it." Did you consider that it was probably something you did and the courts by some miracle decided to use fair justice in this case? The day that a man screwed over by a woman (happens often) doesn't have to pay child support is the day the moon turns into blue cheese and the day that Sadaam Hussein turns into God's chosen Shristian, or a saint. If your complaining about him not paying, then why not give up the kids so he can have them and pay for everything? If your not going to do that then you have no cause to complain. Keep the kids and get no support (which is a stupid law to begin with) or give custody of the kids to him and then he can incur all the expenses. It seems to me the second choice is the INTELLIGENT one. So what if he has a couple Million dollars net worth? What's that got to do with the kids? It seems to me if you saved the %$25,000 in legal fees instead of spending them to get some 800 dollars a month you wouldn't be in such a tight spot. Why spend that much? You dug yourself that hole and no one is to blame but yourself. Not him. He didn't make you march to the court house and blow 25 grand on legal fees. That was your own doing. So how dare you seek to have him pay for those fees. That's swindling and racketeering in my book. It's nonsense to make someone else pay for your choice to dig a 25 thousand dollar hole. Plus you should be happy he paid you a lump sum settlement. I bet it paid off all the "money that is his but he is required to by frivelous laws to give you HIS money" plus ALL the required money untill they turn 18. So if your expecting more than he is required to pay by law just because you see he has more money so you can try to suck more money out of him, that's just wrong. If I were you I would get over it and take the money that you are 'so graciously entitled to by the substandard and prejudiced laws' the United States grants woman today, and keep your mouth shut. I wish this was the 1920s where men never had to worry about woman coming along and sucking the mans hard earned money out of his pocket. I made up a saying too, woman are a lot like hurricanes, they are wet and wild when they blow in, and when they blow out they take your car, your house, and your money. Read it and weep, this is one form of positive justice on the mans behalf. I praise that judge for her fair and well thought of decision and I wish the man luck in his success in life. Yours truly, A fellow male chauvenistic pig,

i mean come on. a female judge "yelled at the guy a few times for his behavior" and still gets away with a deal like that? tell me you didn't pull some crazy stunts too. men in my state are lucky to get joint legal, much less joint physical, and usually around 30%gross,which we are taxed on, plus full med, dental, college fund, etc,all travel is my responsibility, you get the picture.